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My Nigerian engagement ceremony br identity crisis

Sunday, March 8th, 2020

My Nigerian engagement ceremony br identity crisis

I am generally speaking associated with belief that the wedding just isn’t constantly about yourself, nonetheless it should mirror you: your thinking, your values, along with your community. Among the feedback because that was one of our goals in planning the event that we heard most often about our wedding was: “It was so… you, ” and I loved it. I do believe for this reason, I struggled a great deal with my emotions in regards to the Nigerian engagement ceremony that individuals had the week before our wedding. The whole occasion had been simply therefore maybe maybe not me, generally not very.

This really is me right before the ceremony: unsure regarding how we feel and look (and my capacity to walk in those heels). Picture by Genevieve Burruss. Please understand, when we state it was not “me, ” I do not suggest because i am perhaps maybe not Nigerian (although i am perhaps not). After all that the aesthetic ended up being vibrant and over-the-top while We tend towards minimalist and quirky. I am talking about that there have been duplicated recommendations to spiritual values and social values that i really do not share. I am talking about that the (American) food had mushrooms inside it (that I can’t stand) while the accent color had been red (again, perhaps not an admirer). I became in heels as opposed to flats with earrings that hurt my ears, and we also nearly totally missed supper for a costume modification. We spent most of the feeling like a life-size doll evening.

Let me explain with a summary of a Nigerian engagement ceremony…

(Disclaimer: this can be my understanding after nine months of planning, and another time of coping with it, much less some body raised within the tradition. It absolutely was a Christian, Yoruba ceremony. )